JWD: Island Fury (1983)

Also notoriouesly known as; ‘Please Don’t Eat The Babies’…

So i was done with the fucking movie, but i couldnt’ get my fucking laptop working (…which i write my reviews on). So drunk now, in the middle of the night; i decided to watch a ‘Thundercats’ episode while fininhing of my last beer. But im on again, listening to Razakle and horrorcore-shit, but let’s just get on with the fucking review allready….enough drama..right?

Uhm, i mean, please! Why try to make ‘ten year old’ girls look sexy… so incredible awkward and it dosnt’ help that the movie has a kinda pedophilan undertone-which im sure is just an unsucsessful attempt to emphasize for the audience that we follow these girls in an coming-of-age stage. Ehm, this group of hot honnies and their gyes (in extremely small swimming trousers)-with a couple ten year old sisters tagging along (whom of course has the hots for their older sister’s boyfriends) are vacationing on some island which houses a family of awkward senior-cannibals, with a ‘cought in the middle’ grand son; ‘Jimmer’. One day the girls are all grown up and forced back to the island to find some gold, while being taking hostage by a slazeball thug and his couple of cut-throaths mullet-buddies. Well, seems like my dvd-version is cut. Arent’ censorship history, buddy?? But shit; this one has a really stupid plot and reminded me alot of the cult-classic; Motel Hell. I did like the ‘Pa’- character. His acting is fucking wooden as hell, but i was kinda drawn to the charismatic old man. But closing of; this one is an awkward pile of cheese and its verry hard to take seriusly, but at least it has alot of involuntary funny parts and maybe a teaspoon of charm…half a teaspoon. Some cool 80’s angles and colors, but crap me. Really tired now, it’s late, but before im going to bed i feel i need some Jamie Walters shit. That’s right…Jamie Walters!

beerglas-rating-3-5