JWD: Hansel and Gretel (2013)

Nothing like a questionable mockbuster from Asylum…right?

The modern day Hansel is a gye in his mid twenties who lives in the small town of ‘Candle-grove’ (am i right), where he lives with his sister and a widowed father and the only thing Hansel likes doing is playing X-box and eating candy and cakes. When father-Grimm reviels the plans of marrying his much younger girlfriend, selling the house and travel the world; Hansel freaks out and runs to the woods…with his candy…in the middle of the night. His trusty sister, Gretel, promise her father to get him back; following his trail of candy waste. Here you go; another typical Asylum mockbuster with tons of awkward moments and dialogue. Yes, it’s stupid-yes, it’s lame, but there’s Asylum for ya’. I did enjoy the horror-aspects of it and the smaltown atmosphere and Dee Wallace as ‘Lilith’-the psycho bitch/witch out in the woods is really worth the ride. She’s such a psycho and she really falls into her role-kinda like her character in ‘Lords Of Salem’…Jepper; ‘Lords Of Salem’ is a really cool movie and Dee Wallace is a really good actress! Other then that, it’s a graphic and cruel even, horror-movie. To bad i fell asleep towards the ending though-it was getting late, i was really tired and the beer got to my head quicker then i had forseen. Ok, im not gonna lie; I saw the rest the night after. I even had an amlost full can beer left that i saved in the fridge…

beerglas-rating-4